The Report: Wednesday, January 2, 2008

My first day back to work after a nice, long vacation. This was the day of being confronted with my day-to-day challenges when I’m busy and tired and away from home, and I’m still waiting for that delivery tomorrow night, so the options are still limited.

BREAKFAST
Eggs In A Pita

I was very, very uninspired when I woke up this morning, so this is what I had, and the name literally says it all. I took two eggs, scrambled them in a little shaving of butter, and stuffed it in a pita. Period, end of story. That was all there was. Oh, wait — salt and pepper. It was actually eggs and salt and pepper in a pita. On another day, maybe I’d have added some peppers and onions, but I don’t even have peppers and onions, is what I’m saying. It was very simple, it was very tasty — I did a good job of scrambling the eggs slowly so they didn’t dry out or get crusty or brown — and it kept me from getting hungry all morning, unlike yesterday’s oatmeal, which was good but made me hungry.

ME VERSUS STARBUCKS

I have such Starbucks issues, seriously. When I was in grad school ten years ago, I used to regularly — regularly! — get a venti mocha and a cinnamon chip scone for breakfast. That’s something like 900 or 1000 calories right there, almost all of which is pure sugar and fat. I rarely eat pastries there anymore, because as much as I’d like to find the lowfat ones satisfying, I don’t really, at least not enough to make up for the fact that they still have so much sugar that they throw all the counts off for the day.

But oh, the mocha. I do have a weakness for the mocha, more out of habit than anything. The weird thing is, and I’m saying this in the interests of honesty, that I didn’t even want one that badly today, and I had it anyway. Don’t get me wrong — I enjoyed it, it was sweet and tasty, and I had no regrets. The grande with no fat or whipped cream isn’t the worst treat you can choose, but it winds up standing in for probably two other treats I could have, since most of my treats run around 150 calories and this is more like 300. The good news is that at least I get my milk for the day that way. It’s really only “bad” because of the chocolate, and the chocolate is your basic sweet. So that’s really the issue, is that it combines milk that I should have anyway with chocolate that’s a treat, so that’s a lot all at once and doesn’t really spread things out over the day quite as well.

I like lattes okay, but they’re not the sweet I sometimes want. But still, I sense that it’s habit. Not even habit, so much as…it’s a way I give myself something. I can give myself that; that’s within my power every day. Something I enjoy that I know I can have. It’s not a substitute for love; I hate that. It’s just…a gesture of kindness toward myself. I don’t know. I need to think about it, because I think I still want that, but I think I can do it a little “cheaper,” in the sense I’m talking about.

LUNCH
Tomato-Basil Soup

This is an easy one. I chose takeout soup, which I know from previous research is very reasonable in nutritional values, other than way too much salt. It came with a nice slice of multigrain bread. The same place makes a really good salad; it would have been more balanced with a small soup and a small salad, but I was satisfied, and I didn’t get really hungry until mid-afternoon, at which point I had a ginger cookie that was in the break room — actually a “ginger biscuit,” whatever British (?) nonsense that’s supposed to be. It was like a light, crispy cookie, and it was very tasty.

DINNER
Chicken Club Panini, courtesy Lean Cuisine

This was a surprisingly tasty sandwich, although it wasn’t very long ago that I ate it, and I can feel myself hungry already. I want to stress that here, when I talk about being hungry? I am talking about being hungry. Stomach growling, stomach physically hungry. I know the difference between that and “want to eat.” I’m physically hungry, which is what’s getting me. Right now, the roommate is cooking a pizza, and that’s not helping either. Food smells really seem to make me hungry instantly — I wonder whether sucking on a mint or chewing gum or something would help with some of this. Dinner was good, but…I am hungry. Sitting here maybe 45 minutes after I finished eating a big panini sandwich, listening to my stomach growl.

SNACKS

I finished off my evening with a small dish of Haagen-Dazs Extra Rich Light Vanilla Bean. Probably more sugar than is right for the day, combined with the mocha, but overall, I think I did all right.